I was at church last night for the kids Harvest Party and they had pizza. I was so hungry, but pizza obviously breaks all of the Nazi food rules. There was a lone, shiny, beautiful apple sitting on the kitchen counter. I asked one of the guys, "Whose apple is that?" He said, "I don't know, eat it."
"I'm not going to eat somebody else's apple! That would be kind of like......oh I don't know...stealing??" I replied.
This chivilrous knight picked up the apple, took a big honking bite out of it and handed it to me. "There, now its yours." He says.
My hero. I ate it down to the core.
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