Eating to Live on the Outside: Lonni's Sandwiches

Alright, I may be a lot of things, but a coward isn’t one of them. After all, just look at all of the standard American nightmares I’ve braved over the past year: Carino's Italian Grill, Huddle House, Cosmic Ray's Starlight Café, Indigo Joe's, Don Pablo's, Fazoli's, and Denny's.

I feel battled tested to say the least. And I’m going to need all my skills to tackle this week’s restaurant, Lonni’s Sandwiches. I mean come on! Any restaurant with the word sandwich in the title is a major asterisk for the fickle Eat to Liver—hell hath no fury like bread’s scorn.

Upon brief inspection, a lot of the menu is bad news, but, I’m sure I can find something—just in case I’m duped, bonked on the head, tied up, thrown into the back of a Cadillac, and revived by a bucket of cold water, only to find myself chained to a table in Lonni’s Sandwiches. So, lets have at it!

No surprise here, the menu is packed with sandwiches. Okay, no egg salad for me—I actually just threw up in my mouth a little. Yuck, ham and cheese! And I’ll definitely pass on Cecil’s Sunrise. This heart attack bomb is made with egg slices, ham, Swiss cheese, cheddar cheese, and potato bread—eek! What to order, what to order? Here are a couple ideas.

First is the Custom Vegetarian. It can be made with Swiss cheese, cheddar cheese, cream cheese, cucumbers, alfalfa sprouts, sweet onion, lettuce, tomatoes, mayonnaise, black olives, sunflower seeds, and dressing. Well, that is a lot of veggies. If I were ordering this thing, I’d start with whole wheat bread—the grainer the better—and I’d take everything but the cheese and the mayo. So that would make my concession the bread, the salty olives, and the tiny bit of dressing I’d use. I’m not too worried about—that’s a ton of plant matter!

The only other sandwich I’d entertain would be the Mango Breeze, but, I’d first do some renovations. Here’s why. It comes with brie, avocado slices, dried mango chutney, alfalfa sprouts, mayonnaise, and wild rice bread. Even after ditching the brie and mayonnaise, I still think it’s a pretty interesting meal. Oh, and the concession here would be the bread…again.

In addition to sandwiches, Lonni’s Sandwiches also offers soups, salads, desserts, and drinks. Well, the soups aren’t looking too Fuhrman-friendly. Maybe the Wild Rice Soup, but who knows if it’s made with chicken broth or not. If it isn’t, it’d be a solid an option; wild rice, tomatoes, carrots, celery, and corn. The only concession would be the rice—no biggie.

Okay, the desserts and drinks aren’t worth it—onto the salads! I like two of them, but despite their high veggie count, they’ve both got plenty of undesirables that need to be dealt with. Let’s start with the Chef’s Supreme. It’s made with Romaine lettuce, iceberg lettuce, tomato, egg slices, cucumber, radishes, celery, summer squash, sweet onion, ham, turkey, Swiss cheese, and cheddar cheese. I know, what a way to ruin a good thing! The egg, meats, and cheeses are toast—no thank you! Now provided I go easy on the dressing or omit it altogether, this salad is looking pretty good.

The next salad is the Very Vegetarian, which is funny, because the Very Vegetarian comes with cheese and egg—what the heck is vegetarian about that? Anyway, it’s made with Romaine lettuce, iceberg lettuce, tomato, egg slices, cucumber, radishes, celery, black olives, Swiss cheese, cheddar cheese, sweet onion, alfalfa sprouts, garbanzo beans, artichoke hearts, and sunflower seeds—certainly a lot of veggies! Like I said, the cheese and the egg are getting the boot. After that, the only concession would be the black olives and maybe some salad dressing.

You could also give the Wild Rice Salad a try. It’s prepared with wild rice, sliced almonds, celery, onion, green peas, lettuce, egg slices, sweet mustard dressing, and a poppy seed muffin. Once you ditch the eggs and the muffin it’s a little more Fuhrman-friendly, but, that’s too much rice for me. I’d prefer one of the other salads in stead. Personally, I’m leaning towards the modified Very Vegetarian—how about you?

So, is Lonni’s Sandwiches as bad as I originally thought? I mean I was able to find a handful of dishes that an Eat to Liver could sneak by with. The answer is yes. It is still a rough place for a health concession person. In my humble opinion, the menu is way too bogged down with standard American ooey-gooey junk foods, but what do you think? Check out Lonni’s Sandwiches’ menu and let me know how you handle Eating to Live on the Outside. Make a comment or shoot me an email at diseaseproof@gmail.com.
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Sara - August 31, 2007 9:54 PM

How about the fresh fruit salad? You didn't mention the guacamole though that has cheese and mayo that need to be chucked.

lilly - September 1, 2007 12:11 AM

How on earth is wild rice a "concession"?? Wild rice is not even REAL rice...it's a WEED!! I can understand your other points, but I do not agree w/that one...

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