Is pleasing Grandma ruining your health?


  • Are you currently engulfed in the sea of pleasing everyone but yourself?

  • Do you help your children and/or others reach their fullest potential, but neglect your own goals?

  • Are you afraid to “rock the boat” this holiday season and say, “No” to others ~ to the extent that you don’t take care of yourself?

  • Would you like to eat healthier, but are afraid of hurting someone’s feelings by rejecting their food; especially Grandma’s favorite cookies that she made just for you? 
  • Are you going along with the crowd to blend in at the expense of killing yourself?
  • Are you straddling the fence?  Do you want to eat for health, but are afraid of what others might think so you make compromises? 


A people pleaser is concerned with the expectations of others and trying to fit in, even if it means giving up personal goals to do so. Pleasing everyone is emotional dysfunction, and is usually on the side of evil, not goodness. Trying to please others, even if what they are promoting is hurtful, is a deadly snare. Gang members can torture and kill people trying to please their peer group.     

Don’t meet the expectations and demands of others if they are unrealistic and disease promoting.  Love means having the best affect on others, not acting in a way to be viewed more favorably.  The latter is weakness and self-love.     

If you are a habitual people pleaser it will take courage to change the dysfunction. Saying no without feeling guilty can be difficult, but for optimal health, you must change damaging behaviors.

Standing up for yourself and doing what is right, not necessarily what is popular or what is promoted by your family and friends, is the best gift that you can give to others!

Let’s dialogue.  In what practical ways do you need to change this holiday season in order to be emotionally and physically healthy?  (Feel free to use a nickname if you wish to remain anonymous.) 


image credit: flickr by jencu